Kit Harington
Emily Browning
Carrie-Anne Moss
Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje
Jessica Lucas
Jared Harris
Kiefer Sutherland

Janet Scott Batchler
Lee Batchler
Michael Robert Johnson

105 mins.
Action, Adventure, Drama
February 21, 2014

Rated PG-13 for intense battle sequences, disaster-related action and brief sexual content. (MPAA)

“Pompeii” didn’t need to be made or even conceived. How many relatively recent movies or TV shows do we need that are about some sort of gladiator or are set during that time period and contain action/adventure? I thought that “Gladiator” took care of it. Certainly, no one can top it at this point. Also, on television, there was HBO’s “Rome,” which wasn’t about gladiators but was set during the same time period. That was a superior television show. In addition, there was Starz’s “Spartacus,” which wasn’t superlative or even very good, but it did a good enough job, especially during its initial seasons. There has been “The Eagle” (starring Channing Tatum and Jamie Bell), “The Legend of Hercules” (starring Kellan Lutz), “Immortals” (starring Henry Cavill and Mickey Rourke), etc., none of which did anything special. I won’t even get into the classics of the genre: “Spartacus,” “Ben-Hur,” and so on.

With that said, “Pompeii” tells the story of a slave who’s forced into gladiator fighting and falls in love with a royal lady (who returns his affection). This is set against the backdrop of the impending destruction of Pompeii. There’s absolutely nothing new here. I knew the entire story within the first five minutes. Of course, there’s a rival for the lady’s affections, but the lady doesn’t like him. That rival’s a Roman senator, played by Kiefer Sutherland, who speaks as if he’s chewing some food. And, of course, there’s a rival gladiator who needs to win one more fight in order to be freed, supposedly by law (he may be mistaken). Guess who he has to fight? The lead slave/gladiator, played by Kit Harington, is a horseman. He has a way with horses (they provide warnings of impending danger, shocker!) that no one else has (what a surprise!), and that’s what attracts the lady to him (an even bigger surprise!). That’s enough details, though I could continue further into the story’s banality … if I wanted to.

The effects are fine; they meet the standard of the genre. I’m sure that they’re even better in 3D. But, again, we’ve seen things like this so many times that it’s hard to be impressed. Plus, “Gladiator” looked better, in 2D. The dialogue’s predictably wooden and affected; this was written by hacks (again, nothing new).

“Pompeii” is merely a paper-thin reflection of better examples of the epic genre. It’s a woefully typical modern period-piece adventure. It was stale on arrival.

Verdict: Bad

About: (Source: pompeii)

Set in 79 A.D., POMPEII tells the epic story of Milo (Kit Harrington), a slave turned invincible gladiator who finds himself in a race against time to save his true love Cassia (Emily Browning), the beautiful daughter of a wealthy merchant who has been unwillingly betrothed to a corrupt Roman Senator (Kiefer Sutherland). As Mount Vesuvius erupts in a torrent of blazing lava, Milo must fight his way out of the arena in order to save his beloved as the once magnificent Pompeii crumbles around him.